morning moment: {def.} a note of art, thoughts or creative prettiness to start the day.
20 mins pose - A3
20 mins pose - A3. charcoal
5 mins poses - square cardstock. pencil"
10 mins pose - A3. charcoal
20 mins pose - A3. charcoal"
I found this photo from the first blog I dabbled in with my brother. This was before facebook became the place for the family to keep in touch. It didn't last long, but in hindsight, it really was my first taste into this online blog-world-thingymajig.
walking down the aisle {photo by gallant lee}
dad & ajja mangalore {photo by david mcarthur}
Happy father's day Pa, Kaiyeh, my hubby's Dad & grandpa Ajja and to all the fathers out there - Hope you have a special day!
Recently, I am learning to have fun with my art and treat it as play. To embrace the ambiguity; let the paintbrush reveal it's secret in it's own time. I am reminded that I'm a future thinker, future oriented. That is I plan ahead, I envision what could be and it's hard to snap back to the reality of now. Now isn't there yet, there that happy place where my dreams are. There is still doing to be done before what could be, becomes what is. I get frustrated at not being where I want to be, so I am learning to embrace the unknown; the now and all that zen.
"i think this is finished..."No.4 red & blue
It's like Lord, why can't I have it now?! I know, I know, it's about trust, learn to have faith in Your plan and to let it happen in Your time. I need to surrender my control over everything. So I'm learning patience too. To do the doing and take each.step.one.at.a.time. I still get to make lists & plan ahead (yay!) but not so far ahead that it overwhelms me with the bigness of it all.
i wonder what this will be..."
{images by sashe studio's iphone}
SO WHILE I CREATE, I OCCASIONALLY PROCRASTINATE...
I'm fully aware that I procrastinate in order to avoid the present in order to indulge in daydreams of the future (or past.). That's why I try to do something 'productive' and involve some creative practice in my procrastination too. (I say that now, though sometimes I will just eat chocolate and indulge in traveling down the wormhole that is the millions of amazing articles online. Or daytime tv.) Knowing I have these tendencies means I can work with them, indulge in a little postponed productivity but still develop my creative practice (my goal). This only comes from lotsa contemplation & self-observation. So I bring out my polaroid cameras, and try to take 'arty' photos instead of just photos of Jelly. Being such an expensive medium, it does limit my mindlessness and force a little thinking in composition and creativity. Learning to find the beauty & sacredness in the everyday around me. All good things to have for the practice of seeing. Afterall, art or drawing or painting is all a way to see the world right?
SO... ?
Sometimes when you're frustrated, it means it's time to take a step back to see the disconnection. Maybe you're too focused on the end goal and not enjoying the process. Or you haven't spent the time to know what you want. So you head in the wrong direction & your intuition is telling you to watch out! These little niggly irritations could be nuggets of introspection & self-knowledge waiting for you to find. :)
REDBUBBLE UPDATE
I've updated my redbubble site with those recent polaroids. (See I was a little productive!) Photos seem so easy sometimes, point & click then upload. While painting seems to take it's sweet time to reveal itself. I feel a little sad I don't have finished pieces to show. All part of the story that is yet to unfold I guess.
These were plucked fresh from my garden.
Jelly knows the drill. Pose properly and it will be over faster = more play time.
They remind me of The Wizard of Oz. Walking on an adventure somewhere.
{these polaroids are available as a greeting card, postcard or prints on my redbubble site. Click the image to check it out!}
What have you been learning lately about yourself?
p.s Did you enjoy this post? If you did, please use the buttons below to share the joy! Check out my redbubble site and help spread the love about my art. It'll totally make my day! p.p.s While you're at it, you might also like to sign up by email to receive free updates in your inbox or subscribe to my RSS feedThanks muchly for your support!
morning moment: {def.} a note of art, thoughts or creative prettiness to start the day.
CLASS - 5 AUG 2010
20mins pose - A3. A favourite I think. The acrylic paper had a nice canvas texture, I got lucky with the angle and I like that my attempts at the ribs didn't make her look like she got savaged by a beast. Plus I'm tres happy with the way the foot turned out.
20mins pose - A3. I'm not so happy with the face (why do I draw them so angry?) but the hands turned out better than I'd hoped.
CLASS - 12 AUG 2010.
1min poses - A2. very quick sketches, nice to practice focus on tension & angles. Focusing on where the weight falls helps me to pick which lines to draw.
2mins poses - A2. great for developing the discipline to mark the most informative lines.
10 mins pose - A2. I really struggled with the bigger size. A different model, she wasn't as able to sit as still as the previous model. I really enjoyed her bangs, it gave great depth & shadows to her face.
10 mins pose - A2. I'm not sure if I struggle with the bigger size due to a lack of practice, or the inability to see the whole picture at that scale. this is not a favourite. It's educational to see the bad with the good I guess.
A3. I went back to the more familiar smaller size. foreshortening is a hard beast. I swear her foot looked that small compared to her thighs.
20 mins pose - A3. note: don't spend too much time being hung up on one or two areas, and forget the bigger picture. Like making sure you've captured the composition you wanted, and that your proportions are accurate."
20mins pose - A3. Not a good one - an example of bad composition, which didn't give it the framing & space. This meant proportions didn't turn out right because of subconscious cramming. Plus all the time spent on proportions meant the face became flat due to neglect.
{photo & drawings by sashe studio}
As it's been a little over a month since I've been flying solo, there has been a few interesting learnings & tidbits in this new adventure. I know... who knew you could learn so much in just 30 days. It turns out there are a few insights, relizations and whatnot to be had. Here is four I've come to learn ( or learnt to acknowledge):
- Curiousity: People seem to be extra interested to know 'what I've been up to'. There are a few varieties: Some are more of the 'what did you do today?' or the 'so how's the art thing going?' Normally when I was working a conventional 9-5ver, the extent of people curiousity ended at 'how are you?' Now they aren't satisfied with 'it's good' 'fine!' or 'just been busy'. It may just be me, but people seem to want know in greater detail my actual day-to-day activity. Sometimes this feels like added pressure to provide a comprehensive list of productive & worthy activities to justify working from home. I guess that can be a good thing as I learn to battle my inner overwhelm/critic monster -- dressed as laziness. It's good to have people interested in your work, it's better to try to work any situation that has resulted from change to your advantage. Looking at it from a different perspective tends to help. Or, ask for the support or feedback that you want to have. my to do: I'm going to assume that these people are interested in a supportive & beneficial way. Even if it's just so I can practice talking about my work in a positive way. Plus, I'm going to find people who are natural encouraging fire-starters who can pick me up when I feel down.
- Wormholes are everywhere: It's amazing sometimes when painting that the hours will slip by, and I would have forgotten to feed or hydrate myself. Also, the variety of reading materials both online & off are dangerously becoming my time-wormholes. It's hard to let go of all the great information & resources available. I'm struggling to keep up and have come to conclusion I'll have to learn to let them go. Plus these wormholes tend to become the dress-up favourites of procrastination, which is also the mask for avoiding something scary. It's not just me right? Part of living a conscious life, is knowing your weaknesses or just general distraction monsters. There is nothing worse that feeling unproductive AND guilty because you were the cause. my to do: I'm going to keep strict reading/consuming online to just a couple hours on a couple days. Mainly the days when I just don't feel like creating & need fuel for the brain. It has been helping not being online so much the last few weeks. I've finally had the chance to do some internal thinking & reflection on my short & long term goals. I'm not as intimidated at the overwhelming amount of great work out there, plus it doesn't add to the fear of thinking I have nothing original to say. I'm going to remember that I have my own unique perspective and looking at too much of others will drown that out. Also, I'm going to be strict on my meal times too. A hungry artist is a grumpy, unproductive artist
- Trust your intuition: I keep getting reminded of one of the reasons why I wanted to do my own thing. To have the freedom over my own time. When I try to force myself to 'be productive' and cross off certain things off my list, I end up exhausted & any painting I do feels depressing & forced. It may be a cliche but I guess it's true for me. It's best to know yourself wells. You'll know if you're just being lazy so you should do the work, or you're just having a bad brain day and need a mental rest. Mental rest days are good to do non-thinking tasks like tweaking bits of things, house chores...whatever works for you. my to do: I'm going to work WITH my rhythms and take advantage of my productive moods and do work that I want to do. I have found that I actually end up achieving more at the end of the day.
- Rewards work: I've found that having little rewards have been amazing in motivation. Again, it may be a little obvious but I was surprised that even the smallest things like getting a fresh croissant from the bakery, or getting a 20 minute break to watch some tv has been great. They are the little reminders of the joys of working from home, being a master of my time and working to my productivity rhythms. Don't underestimate the power of the little rewards you can give yourself when you want a little motivation, or a little encouragement in whatever new adventure you're on. They don't have to be costly. They could be dual-purpose, be both a treat and on path to your dream goals. Get some sunshine with a short walk around the block, the fresh air can re-ignite the creative juices. Or go for a longer walk to the local shops (healthy) and get yourself a little pastry treat (extra mini reward). Even just a 5 minute break to read something online can also be a nice reward, or some online window shopping? I've found being allowed a day of just doing light house chores or go for a walk & a couple hours of catching up on tv shows resulted in more productive evenings or the rest of the week.It feels win-win because I got to relish in the freedom (mental health), finished chores that would have been at the back of my mind (mental & physical health) plus it re-fuels my desire to do more 'productive' work. my to do: I'm going to keep giving myself little rewards, and discover new ways to find dual purpose rewards. That may require a perspective shift: exercise = fun? I hope so.
{images by Sashe Studio} what do you think of my works in progress?
What do you think of the lessons?
Do they spark any ideas or insights on the way you work or what stops you from doing the work you want to do?
Any suggestions or ideas to add to my to dos ? Let me know in the comments!
Thanks muchly & speak soon!
"Those who wish to sing always find a song." ~swedish proverb
{image courtesy of RubensLP}
When you read this, I would have been one week into a new chapter in this game of life. I've left a fantastic 'Day Job 9-5ver' in order to pursue 'something-myself-online-thing-that-will-involve-art-and-stuff'. I took a week off to get away from the computer to sleep in and indulge in the luxury of bumming around doing nothing but eat & sleep. It almost feels like a graduation day. The fear of the unknown is there. The tingle at the possibilities is there… and the shiver of facing something scary and unknown and the vast possibilities that the potential of it all...OVERWHELMS. MY. MIND. I thought I was going to do the usual creative moonlighting thing, or the weekend business on the side kind-of-thing, or the wait until I'm so wildly successful that the 'thing on the side' takes over the day job thing. All the things you do that seems sensible and rational and helps curb the twin-headed monster that is fear of uncertainty & the unknown with a big sidekick of 'what if you are a COMPLETE FAILURE and end up homeless and eating from bins?' Sometimes though, we have stuff that just ain't 'sensible'. I also knew that with this job, it had become VERY comfortable, very much the safety net that we all seek in security. I knew I was just procrastinating and sitting on my hands spouting excuses. It didn't help that usually I just didn't have the energy after a long day of mental creative work to summon the energy to do anything else either. I loved my job, really I did. I gave it all I had and even with it's frustrations and irritations, the creativity and the people made it a dream job. Except I didn't want a J-O-B. I wanted to create. I wanted to find my own song to sing. Though I could have continue waiting for this elusive perfect timing, or waited until the end of the year and 'start fresh'. Changes were falling into place at work and and there really was no giant obstacle in my way to start NOW. It didn't fit my rational-what-everyone-else-sensibly-does plan but I felt so much peace handing in that letter of resignation. Arguably maybe I 'shouldn't' but it wasn't because I 'couldn't', and that has made all the difference. Sometimes, taking a leap of faith means seizing an opportunity even if it wasn't at your timing. Sometimes you need to put your faith in the journey, even if it leads to "failure". As my husband -- my biggest support & head cheerleader -- reminded me so sagely (paraphrased), "No matter where you end up, the place you end up in is going to still be a place of growth. It will be better than where you are now, because you are expanding and reaching out. Even if the destination isn't quite what you hoped for, you wouldn't be going backwards. Staying because you're scared or comfortable would deny yourself that" So I'm stepping out in faith and moving forward towards a newer and bigger dream, trusting that I can look back and connect the dots that seemingly looks disconnected and 'irrational'. I'm hoping this day will inspire all those people out there with a desire to sing their song, or maybe even a secret song they already know but are too scared to sing. I'm hoping this day finds you. Be inspired, take that fear with you on your journey and trust in the dots connecting. I hope you'll join me in this adventure and it'll encourage you to nurture the creativity inside you and let it sing.. ———————————————— comment zen… (inspired by havi)This is part of my new practice of expressing myself creatively. This reveal is something that’s hard for me and requires love, patience and grace.What I really appreciate: being acknowledged (and maybe even cheered on) for being in the process. I like it when you say yay, you!What I can’t deal with right now: any form of critique. I’m not interested in knowing about how I can do better or what I’ve misspelled. Maybe later on. Right now this is about me and my baby step process. Thanks muchly!”
I love ink drawings, I love it's subtle nuances in depth and how it says so much with so little.
Kagan McLeod is a very skilled illustrator and his art has all the beautiful storytelling depth I love in ink drawings.
He has really inspired me to take up ink drawings again. Ink requires real confidence in the line you want to draw. There is no apple - z for ink! Check out his life drawings! I may try to bring some inks for the Thursday life drawing sessions and see how I go. If I can get one passable work I'll be very happy.
I wonder if I like ink so much because I tend to be tentative with my drawings which results in a messy scribbly 'style'. I really admire the confidence that ink requires; there is a strength in the line work when the artist is confident in what they are doing. I can't wait for the next session; I desperately need the practice. Plus it's my kind of meditation!
The best drawing from my first life-drawing session (since my uni days) from last thursday. taken with my iphone, please excuse the low quality.
morning moment: {def.} a note of art, thoughts or creative prettiness to start the day. I LOVE life drawing, and missed it. It was something I assumed only 'real' artists had time to do it. Had the justification to invest time for it. I attended a life drawing class last night (in eltham). It was one of those things, once I made the decision to live an artist life, opportunities came through doors that I didn't know existed. It feels like a good sign. (I didn't take a photo of the room or model cos I was too shy!)
Los Angeles based artist Alex Cherry produces beautiful pieces with incredible textures and depth.
He has only one rule: If it looks good, it works. I love the pairing of simple, minimal silhouettes with the complex, busy textures. It invites the viewer to wonder about the message behind the image, with just enough abstract-ness and simplicity to allow your own interpretation.
Click here to purchase his open edition art prints at Eyes On Walls who are his exclusive publishers.
'Disagreements in relationships aren't as dangerous as secrets. Secrets breeds mistrust.' Trust requires confidence in security and the space to feel safe. Gain trust by daring to risk vulnerability and sharing secrets, and allowing space for the other to do the same. Dare to share. Create the safety to share. Gain trust by looking after the vulnerability.
Skydiving. It was on my list of 'things to do' in life. I'm terrified of heights, but it seemed like something I should do. Strange I know. Actually, when the opportunity came to do it, even when bad weather meant I couldn't do it over a beach as I had hoped, even when I was strapping up and watching in horror as they explained my need to sign their documents, I still felt an internal urge that I had to do it. As my heartbeat increased with each feet the rickety old plane rose, my stomach couldn't handle the wobbly movement of the plane. I was feeling such motion-sickness I actually couldn't wait to get out of the plane. I was actually LOOKING FORWARD to jumping out of a plane at 12 000 ft in a daggy polyester jumpsuit, stuck to the front of a constantly chewing-gum adrenaline junkie. I didn't enjoy the usual claim of calm when coming down and when the shoot opened, the spinning actually made my nausea worse. I was just so glad to touch the ground. In the end, I am glad I did it. I realised I had to do it, because I was scared of it. I needed it because there would come a day, when I was sick of being in the 'safety' of my current situation and would look forward to doing something most sane people would consider irrational. Jumping into fear & the unknown. Fear and unknown are emotional responses. You may know in your head that success is rationally possible, but the fear still clings to you like fluff. It's hard to get rid of all of it. I am at that point now. The whispers inside me to create, to express myself more authentically & creatively are now as loud as nausea can be. I don't know what I am jumping into. I don't know exactly what I am doing. The fear is still there, but I am going to make it my friend. I am going to trust the whispers and let it sing. I look at that picture and it gives me faith, that it would all turn out for the good in the end. Hope is my friend too. ------------------------------------------------ comment zen... (inspired by havi) This is part of my new practice of expressing myself creatively. This reveal is something that’s hard for me and requires love, patience and compassion. What I really appreciate: being acknowledged (and maybe even cheered on) for being in the process. I like it when you say yay, you!
What I can’t deal with right now: any form of critique. I’m not interested in knowing about how I can do better or what I’ve misspelled. Maybe later on. Right now this is about me and my baby step process.
Thanks muchly!”
Sometimes, it's nice to just look up and have a mini daydream.
{photo by sashe studio}
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
- Marianne Williamson